Tag Archives: Derek Jeter

The Dark Knight Rises: The Return of Alex Rodriguez

a-rod-hit-his-first-home-run-of-the-year-and-now-yankees-fans-love-himForget about Matt Harvey. The Real “Dark Knight” of Gotham is Alex Rodriguez.

His story parallels the the last three Christian Bale Batman movies. Seriously think about it…

A-Rod saves the city in 2009 and delivers a world championship. Early on, Batman saves Gotham from the Scarecrow

A-Rod makes a few mistakes for PEDs, becomes the face of the steroid epidemic, and Commissioner Selig tells him to go away for a while. Batman takes the blame for Harvey Dent’s death and Commissioner Gordon tells him to go away for a while.

A-Rod works through his suspension, multiple injuries, and what seems to basically be depression as the Yankees crumble. Batman comes back from multiple injuries and his literal prison of despair to again help fight the injustice that has overtaken Gotham. A-Rod, like Batman in the third and final act, may not be as young as he once was, but he still has something left to prove to a lot of people.

There are more parallels for this story than just A-Rod being Batman.

Derek Jeter is obviously Harvey Dent. The White Knight of Gotham who saved the Yankees from the depths of nothing to bring them back to glory and restore sanity to the city. Alex Rodriguez accepted his suspension not only to sort out his own life, but to also not take away from Jeter’s last season. Jeter (Dent) gets all of the glory while Rodriguez sits in the shadows and waits until the city needs him again. I could totally see Jeter being nice in the spotlight and a total dick outside of Yankee Stadium…you know…kinda…what’s the word I’m looking for here? Oh yeah. Two-Faced.

David Ortiz is Bane. They are both roided out monsters who just mash things…well to be specific, Ortiz mashes baseballs and Bane mashes faces. Gotham hates both of them and they’ve done a lot to take the city down, whether it be by a Red Sox Championship or threatening to nuke the entire city. To be honest I’m not sure which is worse.

Madonna is Catwoman here. The woman that A-Rod has had, and I’m sure he wants again. He’ll end up in a small cafe somewhere with her as Joe Torre looks on knowingly. She may be 100 years old but she sure is still pretty damn flexible.

Yes, Joe Torre is Alfred. He was there for A-Rod during his early battles against the BoSox, and was his handler until he left in 2007. He was the older, wiser man in A-Rod’s life. Sure Torre batted him 8th against Verlander in 2006, but Alfred wasn’t always nice to Batman either. Torre has remained a part of the MLB and A-Rod’s life as the Executive VP of Baseball Operations. I’m not really sure what he does, but then again he may not either.

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Hold my calls...it's naptime

Bud Selig plays he role of Commisoner Gordon here. He knows that steroids and A-Rod make the game better and more profitable, but he has to save face. Commissioner Gordon knows the city is better with Batman but he needs to save face as well. I really hate Selig and really like Gordon so this comparison really hurt to write.

We’ll soon find out if like Batman, A-Rod returns to glory and ends up getting his own statue in monument park. (Every other player seems to get one) Only time will tell if he’s ready to sacrifice himself for his fans, and this city.

If he is, then we can finally say:

Alex Rodriguez is back. The Dark Knight Rises.

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How Bout Them Yanks? Part One

We’ve made it through a month of baseball so far and it’s already felt like a small roller coaster. I’m living and dying with each pitch and it’s not October yet so I’m pretty much screwed. For any Mets fans out there, October is the month where the good teams get to keep playing.

Here are my thoughts on some members of the Yankees roster:

Alfonso Soriano- Can he never play RF again? That would be great thank you. Also if you throw him anything but a breaking ball away you should be sent back to AAA.

John Ryan Murphy- DON’T YOU EVER CALL HIM “JR” AGAIN. Only going by his proper two first names within a name. It’s what people down south like to do I guess.

Hiroki Kuroda- Kuroda is so old, he plays for the Yankees.

Yangervis Solarte- The Venezuelan Roy Hobbs, just minus the power, wonderboy bat, gunshot wound, Robert Duvall following him around, and a secretive past that’s only known by a woman in Chicago. There goes Solarte, the best there ever was for those few days in April.

Derek Jeter- PLEASE DON’T GO I DON’T REMEMBER WHAT BASEBALL WAS LIKE BEFORE YOU I REALLY DON’T WANT BRENDAN RYAN AS OUR STARTING SS. I’LL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT JUST PLEASE DON’T GO YET UNLESS WE TRADE FOR TULOWITSKI THEN YOU CAN GO IT’LL BE FINE.

 

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Audio of the Week: Yet Again, John Sterling Ceases to Amaze Me

So Jeter got his 3,000th hit on Saturday, but according to John Sterling, he actual got more. Sadly this is real audio from his sign off.

 

OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS OF ALL THE DRAMATIC THINGS JAHHN STERLING SCREWED UP A CALLHH!!!!

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George Steinbrenner’s Best Television Moments

In honor of the late, great, George Steinbrenner’s birthday, also known as Independence Day, I bring to you his best moments.

Steinbrenner had a knack for using the media to his advantage, all in the name of getting more publicity for himself, and the Yankees.

George and Billy Martin for Miller Lite

It tastes great!

George on 60 Minutes with Ed Bradley

Steinbrenner admits to putting his foot through a television and being a sore loser. Also says that players shouldn’t be heroes unless they act like heroes. Now I see where Hank Steinbrenner gets it from.

Steinbrenner and Jeter Visa Commercial

Steinbrenner in the Conga line= priceless

Steinbrenner’s interview right after winning 1998 World Series

I love how he admits he knows nothing about computers. Also gave a lot of praise to a lot of people, not himself.

Steinbrenner helps ANSKY

The “ANSKY” guys’ commercials were popular at the end of the 90’s. “What the hell is ANSKY?” you ask? GOOGLE IT!!!

Steinbrenner on Seinfeld

“SINGLES TABLES ARE FOR LOSERS!”…”I don’t like putting undo pressure on people.”

Steinbrenner Hosts SNL

This was saved for #1 because it’s all about George.

Love him or hate him, George really did love New York, and all of the media attention being an owner brings. What else do you think should be on here?

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Pic of the Week (Possibly Year): Jeter is Patriotic

This is the funniest thing you will see all day, unless your drunk uncle blows his hand off with a firework

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SWISHA Met Your Motha

Monday night marked the acting debut of Nick Swisher on an episode of CBS’s How I Met Your Mother.

Swisher enjoyed filming the show, but probably not as much as winning the Series

The episode, entitled “The Perfect Week” had a baseball theme as the main character Barney tries to score with a different woman each night of the week.  There were baseball references galore including not mentioning “the perfect week” for fear of jinxing it as well as the sound score from the movie Major League.

Barney’s perfect week was almost ruined during his attempt at sealing the deal with girl number seven.  He was close to closing out the game when Swisher, playing himself, walked into the bar.

As, the show pointed out, you can’t compete with a New York Yankee. Just look at the list of women Yankees have dated over the years.

Better yet, go look at some pictures.

Goodbye Johnny Damon...We'll miss you and your wife

This was my first time watching the show and it wasn’t bad. I liked the baseball references and the cameo by Jim Nantz, which was hilarious.  Swisher didn’t say much, but it’s fun seeing a player doing something other than playing baseball.

Derek Jeter and George Steinbrenner still have the edge with the acting chops, as both have hosted Saturday Night Live. Jeter, Bernie Williams, and Paul O’Neill, Danny Tartabull have all appeared on Seinfeld at one time or another as well.

Although it was cool seeing Swisher, if you’re like me, you can’t wait until you see him and the rest of the Yankees on the field in Florida starting spring training.

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HIP HIP JORGE!!!!

Jorge lays the smackdown

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